Acting accordingly

Today’s blog post comes from Cindy! Take it away, Cindy...

“All persons shall conduct themselves in a manner that is consistent with the intended use of the premises.”

That sign, in the lobby of the Ahwahnee Hotel in Yosemite National Park, is a fabulous example of how our manners should adapt to the environment.  As someone who has studied and taught these rules for a career, I would be the first to say there are some manners that are always consistent. For example, being respectful is always important just as being a great listener.

But there are moments when proper etiquette might be rather unusual—even counterintuitive—but still befitting the circumstances. Let me explain. 

Earlier this year, famed cellist Yo-Yo Ma presented a solo concert at Hodgson Hall on the campus of the University of Georgia. He was dressed in a beautifully tailored suit playing a one-of-a-kind antique cello.  The audience was spellbound as he played.

After the intermission, he arrived on stage with his suit jacket off wearing a red UGA sweatshirt!  And, the crowd went crazy, yelling “Go Dawgs!” and even woof-woof-woofing! 

After the concert, a friend saw me and expressed her dismay that people would start yelling in the concert hall.  I agreed that for one second I thought I was at a football game, but very quickly added how wonderful it was that a professional cellist at the top of his game could share his expertise and get a rousing response from the audience when he chose to identify with their home team and home town!  I would equal it to someone bringing me a favorite bottle of wine when they were invited to my home for dinner.  After this exchange, my friend was accepting and even thoughtful about what she had experienced. 

So, back to that sign in the hotel lobby. We should all think about where we are and how we should act accordingly! Even yelling in a concert hall has its place. BRAVO!

How to e-mail your college professor

Actual e-mail received (and illustrated) by Dr. Janet Frick

See that e-mail up there? That's an example of how not to address your college professor.

We talked with UGA Psychology Professor  Dr. Janet Frick, about e-mail etiquette, as the above sample is hardly unique among all she's seen in over 15 years of teaching.

When she started her career, e-mail from students was more formal and thoughtful, possibly because at the time, "it was much more effortful for students to have access to a computer," she says. 

But over the past couple of years, Frick has noticed a change in the quality of e-mails she gets from her students.

"Today's undergraduates are a little 'Post E-mail,'" she says. "They are more likely to text. That engenders a quicker style, a  less formal style, a  familiarity." And they transfer that style to their e-mail.

It pays to be respectful in your e-mails for many reasons. For instance, Frick admits that students with solid e-mail etiquette stand out, that they appear to "be more polite, take school more seriously, and approach school as a professional environment."

Here are some quick tips from Frick on how to convey that respect to your professors:

• Make the subject line informative—instead of "hey," try, "Help needed with online quiz."

• Use the proper address. Unless you've been told otherwise by your instructor, always address them as "Dr." or "Prof." While it's a safe bet to call many high school teachers "Mr." or "Ms.," some college-level instructors bristle at that. Never use "Mrs.," even if you know your instructor is married—she may not have the same last name as her partner.

• Introduce yourself. Professors teach a lot of classes with a lot of students. Keep it short and helpful: "Hello, this is Joe Smith, I'm in your intro class at 11 a.m."

• Keep the tone respectful. Imagine you are writing the parent of a brand-new boyfriend or girlfriend.

P.S. - Frick gently responded to the student who e-mailed her the above sample, making suggestions on how to improve his next e-mail to her. The student thanked her for her advice!

 

Reaching into the community

Debra teaching the art of handshakes with the PRSSA at UGA

The women of ELI — Debra Lassiter, Cindy Haygood, and April McLean — are probably best known for their work with children through Perfectly Polished. They are familiar faces at the Ron Clark Academy in Atlanta. And those who want to become certified children’s etiquette consultants know that ELI sets the gold standard in training.

But did you know that ELI’s outreach goes far beyond that?

Let’s just take a quick look at Debra’s current teaching schedule to get an idea of how busy she stays.

When Debra is not busy teaching elementary, middle and high school students through Perfectly Polished, she is regularly bringing etiquette to the larger community Northeast Georgia community.

In October, she spoke about professional development (resumes, dressing for interviews, meeting and greeting) to the Public Relations Student Society of America at the University of Georgia. She gave a dining tutorial to the Georgia Society of CPAs. She taught job skills through Bread for Life, a local non-profit that brings people out of poverty and into the workforce.


Debra with the Georgia Society of CPAs

In November — after mentoring a new group of consultants during ELI’s training week — Debra will speak about business etiquette for “life after college” at the UGA Terry College of Business Women’s Conference. And she’ll share professional business savvy with educators who are aspiring administrators through Northeast Georgia RESA (Rising Stars).

Of course, while all of this is going on, she is also planning (along with Cindy and April) the annual Holly Ball for Perfectly Polished lead dance members, as well as the Mystery Mistletoe Dinner Dance (a three-course dining tutorial with dances in between) for Perfectly Polished seventh graders.

And that just gets us through the winter. There are plenty more classes and speaking engagements that follow in the spring! For Debra, it’s just part of the job she loves. For ELI, it’s a way to keep spreading our favorite message: etiquette is the key to more kind, fulfilling, and enjoyable lives.