Is this the end of Olympic handshakes?

The spirit of friendship

Hand hygiene was the focus of an international disagreement of Olympic proportions – literally.

The British Olympic Association’s (BOA) chief medical officer recently advised against athletes shaking hands with each other at the London Olympics this July, in order to prevent the spread of illness.

However, Australian athletes will most certainly ignore that advice, as the Australian Olympic Committee spokesman Mike Tancred told Agence France-Presse.

“Australian athletes have always extended the hand of friendship and we will most certainly being doing that in London," said Tancred. “For us, someone not shaking hands would be an embarrassment. It's the Australian way.”

Australian athletes, he said, will simply wash their hands regularly and use antiseptic gel when necessary.

If we could, we’d shake Tancred’s hand right now in hearty agreement. After all, handshaking is an integral portion of our curriculum when we train etiquette consultants.

Our trainees in action!

While the origins of the handshake are not completely known, one theory is that it was a gesture of peace—if you were shaking someone’s hand, that meant that the hand wasn’t holding a weapon. In any case, the handshake is a popular greeting all around the world, expressing welcome, friendship, acceptance, peace—all things celebrated by the Olympics.

We understand why the BOA is concerned about germs—the Agence France Presse article notes that “a number of” athletes became ill at the 2010 Commonwealth Games in New Delhi.

But consider the advice from the Australian athlete’s medical officer: avoid touching banisters and railings, wash your hands regularly—but don’t avoid shaking hands.

Sounds like good advice for anyone.

Restaurant: no crying kids allowed!

No fussy children here...yet. The night is young.

At some point in your life, you’ve sat near a child pitching a fit in a restaurant. Whether you’re the hapless bystander or the parent desperate to calm your child (and possibly actually eat something), you know that it doesn’t make your dining experience a pleasure.

One pizza restaurant in Atlanta is trying to eliminate the more extreme cases of juvenile misbehavior with a note in the menu.



After a patron was apparently hit in the head by a toy flung by another person’s child, Grant Central Pizza management wrote the note, which reads: "GCP is proud of its reputation as a family restaurant, a title that we will work to keep. Unfortunately a number of our diners have posted unpleasant experiences because of crying and unsupervised children. To ensure that all diners have an enjoyable lunch or dinner with us we respectfully ask that parents tend to their crying tots outside."

Are you a fan of such a policy? Do you think it goes too far? What if you’re a parent – would a note like this make you feel more or less welcome at the restaurant?

We don’t expect parents of young children to give up restaurants. Sometimes it’s impossible to get a babysitter. Sometimes, mom and dad want to — gasp — eat as a family out in a restaurant. Children can be unpredictable, of course, so here are our tips to ensure an enjoyable dinner out with the family.

• Go earlier than later. Children, like many adults, get cranky when tired. If you want a more pleasant mealtime (and easier bedtime later), eat at the early side of dinnertime.

• Pick an appropriate place. “Appropriate” depends on your family’s taste, budget, and lifestyle — it doesn’t necessarily mean a fast food restaurant (although it certainly can). Mostly, it means a place that has a menu you like and a family-welcoming atmosphere.

• Be prepared. If your child has a large appetite, offer a small meal before you go to the restaurant. If you aren’t sure the restaurant serves food your child will eat, bring a small, unobtrusive snack, like peanut butter crackers or dry cereal. We do not recommend bringing in outside food to an establishment except in the case of very small children. We don’t think any server will mind a toddler eating Cheerios, especially if it keeps the child occupied and happy. Similarly, pack a small treat bag to keep small hands busy — we recommend picture books or a few small toys that are easy to keep track of throughout the meal.

• Don’t push it. Children have a knack for keeping us on our toes, and often their most dramatic tantrums occur suddenly at the end of an otherwise perfect evening. Are things going well? Great! It’s time to make your exit. Get that dessert to-go and eat it at home to celebrate.

Happy Valentine's!

Happy Valentine's Day!

Time for a Quick Top 5: Valentine's Date Night Edition.

1. Be on time! Don't keep your date waiting!

2. Be clean! Go easy on fragrance, too. What you love might make your date sneeze.




3. Be prepared! If you failed to get reservations at your favorite restaurant, a picnic is a respectable, spontaneous choice.

4. Be respectful! Make eye contact, keep the smartphone off the table during dinner, open doors and pull back chairs when applicable.



5. Be fun! Make lively conversation, eat good food, choose activities that you enjoy and aren't stressful, tell your loved ones how much they mean to you.

More vintage Valentine's advice

We had so much fun time traveling to 1959 that we thought we’d do it again.

Valentine’s Day is right around the corner, and for the most up-to-date etiquette advice on the holiday, we decided to turn to…1961.

The Feb. 14, 1961 edition of the Rock Hill (S.C.) Herald has two articles well worth a look.

The first article—headlined “Will you be my Valentine? Yes, but don’t soil the wallpaper”—notes that at the time, a whopping 255 million Valentine cards would be mailed that year. That apparently begs the question, “Will she truly be your Valentine? Will he love you ever?”

Good news—the answer, writer Ward Cannel said, is yes, as long as you follow a few rules, including the following: “A gentleman does not lean his head against the wall as it might soil the paper;” “A lady does not strike a gentleman with her fan or handkerchief;” “Do not pick the teeth, scratch the head, blow the nose or clean the nails in public.” (Read the article for the full list of advice!)

Just below that article is a true gem from AP wrtier Hal Boyle: “Man’s plea: Let’s reverse Valentine’s Day racket,” reads the headline.



“Ladies, for years you have sandbagged your boyfriends on St. Valentine’s day,” he writes, then offers some tongue-in-cheek (we hope) tips on how to please your fella.

“He’ll think you’re real dreamy if you gift him with a pair of diamond-studded gold cufflinks,” he writes. “Later if necessary, you can get him to hock them to take you on your honeymoon.”

And if a down payment on a sports car, a shopping spree at a sporting goods tore or a steak dinner doesn’t work out, “you can always hand him a new billfold full of folding money,” writes Boyle. “Money is always appropriate. Men never have too much of it.”

Here’s to a slightly more romantic Valentine’s this year!

Welcome the Belle of the Ball!

We are pleased to feature a guest post from Chelsea Hanson!

Belle of the Ball is a new featured column we will be running in coordination with Chelsea at Southern Gent Gifts. Be sure to check them out for great gift ideas for yourself or someone special.


Belle of the Ball presents: 5 Ways to Impress a Lady on the First Date


So often I hear men say that they’ve been on hundreds of first dates, but very few second dates. It’s no mystery that a first date can be a nerve-wracking experience. It is also very easy to make a mistake. But fear not gentlemen, with these five easy steps you will be on your way to a second date in no time.



First and foremost, CALL AND HAVE A PLAN.

I understand that it is so much easier to text, “Let’s hang out Wednesday,” BUT that gives a girl no direction. When you make the decision that you would like to spend time with us here are a few KEY things that should be remembered.

• CALL - pick up the phone and call the lady you are interested in seeing; this is a small gesture that we all appreciate. A call can be intimidating for some, but if you don’t have the guts to call her, how do you plan to sit through an entire date’s worth of conversation? Always call!

• DATE AND TIME - Let the girl know a date and time of the actual date. This is key for many aspects, from attire to scheduling. She needs to know if you’re going out at night, if it’s a casual dinner or if you’re going to the symphony. Planning is important. A first date is not the best time for spontaneity.

• RESERVATIONS - If possible make reservations. Do not show up with no plan in mind. We want to spend time with you, so make life easier by planning ahead with reservations. A woman is impressed when you can walk in, simply say your name, and are led to a table for two.

Second, DON’T FORGET SIMPLE GESTURES.

Pick the lady up at her place and come to the door. Do not wait in your car. If we are running late don’t worry—remember, we are trying to impress you and have taken the time to do so. Three simple gestures that you can make that will go a long way are:

• Open the car door.

• Open the door at the restaurant.

• Pull out her chair.



These simple things may not seem like much, but growing up, most of us have seen our dads perform these simple gestures daily with our mothers. Old school, classic, and shows respect.

Third, KEEP THE CONVERSATION ON A POSITIVE NOTE.

You may be having tons of problems. You may HATE your job, be failing a class, fighting with your parents, arguing with your roommate, feeling broke, thinking your ex is evil, or all of the above. And yes, we are willing to listen, but we agreed to a DATE. We agreed to spend time with you because we want to get to know you. We do not want to be your psychiatrist, especially when trying to have a good time. If you can’t think of anything to say, or are having an off day, or even really want to impress us, ask questions! The easiest way to strike up a conversation with anyone, especially a woman on the first date, is to ask her questions. But be careful to keep the questions grounded a bit. Don’t ask her if she plans to have kids or when she wants to get married. Save those for date 197, not date number 1.

Fourth, CASUALLY PAY WITHOUT US NOTICING.

There is nothing more awkward than the check sitting on the table between us staring us in the face. Even if you are going to pay and planning on it, at that moment we are debating whether we should offer or if we even brought cash or cards. Before the check arrives, slip off to the bathroom or to the bar for after-dinner drinks, grab the waiter or a hostess, slip her your credit card and pay the bill. That way when the check comes back, it is already taken care of and awkward moment avoided.

Fifth and FINALLY, FINISH THE DATE.

Even if you plan on going out after, make sure to close the date. Take us home, tell us you had a great time. It’s always difficult to know what to do after dinner, whether you take her out with your friends or go grab after-dinner drinks. Even so, make sure that we get home okay. MOST importantly - call the next day and tell us thank you. If you don’t see a future, a simple text is fine. Just remember to end on a good note because even if nothing happens in the future, it is better to be known as a gentleman than a jerk. Girls talk, it will get around that you were not courteous and respectful.



Follow these five simple rules and you will be will on your way to a second date. What you do from there is up to you. Remember, always be a gentleman and keep it classy. - cHc



About Chelsea Hanson: Chelsea is currently finishing her undergraduate degree in advertising at the University of Georgia. She is a 22-year-old native of Houston, Texas, with a flair for event planning. She has worked in events at the Houston Museum of Fine Arts, as well as Epting Events in Athens, Georgia. Her favorite pastime, though, is writing. Southern Gent Gifts is her personal blog that features different gift ideas for the men in everyone's lives.

News Flash: Cupid Prescribes!

Etiquette changes with the times. Nowhere is this more evident than in archival material.

Valentine’s Day on the brain? For some charming, if slightly outdated, advice, why not take a quick travel in time…to 1959?

Feb. 8, 1959, to be precise— as captured in an article published that day in The Lakeland (Fla.) Ledger, written by a mysterious figure only known as “Nan.”

The headline?

“Cupid Prescribes…HOW TO BE QUEEN OF HEARTS…Valentine Etiquette.”

So—what does Nan have to say? For one thing, how to handle an unwanted gift.

“…If his gift in remembrance of the romantic day is lacking in imaginativeness, a real Queen of Hearts will still accept it with an enthusiastic show of genuine pleasure,” writes Nan. “After all, that box of chocolates or bouquet of flowers may have cost him a week’s lunch money.”

That’s not bad advice, actually. When opening a present, no matter the contents, you only need say two words: “Thank you.” (With as much enthusiasm as you can muster.)

Nan goes on to extol the virtues of a lady’s “daintiness.” If the Valentine’s gift is a box of chocolates (which “milady must open…as soon as she receives it”), one should first offer some chocolate to the giver, then “daintily choose a piece for herself.” No foraging in the box for favorite pieces or complaining about the chocolate itself—“The whole situation calls for a bit of feminine restraint,” Nan writes. “Don’t tear into the wrappings as if starved for sweets.”

If the gift is flowers, “the recipient should pin it upon her dress immediately,” says Nan. Corsages are “almost certain to contain something red, so bear this in mind when deciding what to wear.”

What if the lady wants to give a fellow a gift? Nan advises to “keep the token small and inexpensive….some home-made cookies or fudge, prettily packaged, are sure to please a man.”

Home-made cookies or fudge would please most people, probably.

Next week’s blog will be full of more Valentine’s goodness…just a little bit more modern.

Re-gifting 101

Is this a grin or a grimace? How many ties does one person need? Think he'll re-gift it?

It can’t be helped: somewhere in your holiday gift stash is likely something you already have or don’t really want. What to do?

You might be one of the gigantic crowd of shoppers who are returning $46 billion in holiday merchandise, according to the National Retail Federation. But there are other options to ensure a happy life for the object elsewhere: recycling, donating, and re-gifting (or giving the gift to someone else).

Use caution when re-gifting! Can you imagine holding on to a present for ages, forgetting its origin, and then re-gifting it to the very same person who gave it to you in the first place? Ouch! Our tips will help you re-gift without any hurt feelings.

• Re-gifting no-nos: Used gift cards (you can re-gift if the card holds the total amount, but be sure of that!), anything you’ve opened and used, and personalized or hand-made items. Keep a personalized or hand-made gift in a seldom-used drawer—maybe you can use it in the future someday—and try to bring it out on display when the person who gave it to you is visiting.

• Store presents to re-gift in a designated place, like a closet or drawer, but be sure to keep a sticky note on each item identifying the original gifter.

• Remove all original wrapping paper and tags, and make sure you’ve removed any cards tucked inside. When it’s time to re-gift the item, wrap it again and make it look fresh.

• Make sure you are re-gifting with purpose. Choose a gift hat matches the person and occasion.

• Have an unwanted gift card and don't know anyone else who could use it? Find online gift card auction sites that can give you a portion of the card's cash value, says Pamela Eyring, Director of The Protocol School of Washington (and a member of our team of experts), in a recent article.

• Try to re-gift “in different social circles,” writes our colleague, etiquette expert Jacqueline Whitmore. “Play it safe and don’t regift to someone who might know the person who originally gave the gift to you.” (That’s where those sticky notes come in handy.)

• Don’t tell the person that it’s a re-gift! Some things are better left alone.

• When all else fails, re-gift to charity — just make sure the items are in excellent condition.

Be sure to send a thank-you note to the original gifter! Remember, it’s the thought that counts — or, as Pierre Corneille once said, “The manner of giving is worth more than the gift.”