Happy Peaceful Thanksgiving!

To our friends in the U.S. - Happy Thanksgiving!

Sometimes it's hard to stay positive amid all the turmoil, both everyday and extreme, that surrounds us in our personal lives and in the broader news of the world. Let's use this Thanksgiving as a time to gather how we can and appreciate the love that does surround us, whether you find it in family, friends, nature, or elsewhere!

For those anticipating big family gatherings, we have a few tips to keep the peace...

• Your family may be the type who thrives on lively, boisterous discussions and arguments, and manages to end all of them with a hug. But if your family is the kind to leave seriously upset after a debate, skip it this time, and avoid talking about politics, religion, or other hot-button topics.

• Unplug! Keep screens off the table, and save them for a little leisure time when everyone is resting, post-meal.

• Or get outside. A walk around the neighborhood can be a healthy respite after marathon eating, and maybe even inspire some good conversation.

• Remember that deep down, you really do love each other! 

Happy Holidays!

To Ghost or Not to Ghost?

...From a party, that is.

As the holiday party season begins, you might find yourself with at least one work or social engagement already on the calendar. Such a time can be the pinnacle of fabulousness for the avid party-goer, and a dreaded responsibility for the classic introvert. For some, the idea of ghosting—leaving a party without saying goodbye, just slipping quietly out the door—can hold immense appeal.

This ghost has clearly been to a party

It sounds like a huge etiquette no-no, but there is support of the practice. Like this article, for example, which reminds us that saying goodbye to the host before leaving can interrupt conversations, grind the social flow to a halt, and result in an awkward bummer of a farewell. Replace the spoken goodbye with a text or email later, and you're golden, the writer says.

We can see the attraction of ghosting in some specific situations, like perhaps a social anxiety-fueled moment that requires an immediate exit...or, in less dire stations, simply being exhausted at the end of a long night. And what if you're at a huge party, where you're convinced your host wouldn't miss you—let alone be able to simply find you to say goodbye?

While we believe that etiquette is a nuanced, malleable thing that can change with the times, we also believe that whenever possible, saying goodbye to your hosts and thanking them for a good time is the best thing to do.

Imagine you're the host, and you've just noticed that a guest has gone missing. Vanished, in effect. Would you worry for his or her welfare? Fret over what happened? Spend valuable party time texting, calling, or wandering aimlessly in hopes of finding your friend? Assume that the party's been a total bust, or that you've offended people somehow? 

The host has likely spent some time, effort, and resources on creating a (hopefully) pleasant experience for you. Taking a brief moment to thank them before you leave is always most appreciated. 

And if you really, truly do need to split, right then, right there, send an explanation as soon as you can via call or message, and go ahead and thank them for the invitation!

Perfectly Polished Spotlight: William

Our etiquette school, Perfectly Polished, opened in 1985; today, we teach around 4,000 students a year in 12 area counties. We've loved watching our students grow up over the years. Sometimes, they become young adults who help us teach our younger students! Join us in spotlighting some of these young adults who make Perfectly Polished so special...

We are pleased to continue our series in spotlighting members of our Perfectly Polished student staff, especially those who have been with us since they were some of our youngest Perfectly Polished students! Today, we spotlight William English. William began taking Perfectly Polished lessons in third grade; now he's a third year student at UGA.

No missed opportunities!

"There is one story that I get to tell every single year around a month before the Spring Formal and it's one of my favorites. When I was a young seventh grade man, I had this beautifully massive crush on a girl named Caitlin. I wanted to dance with her at the Spring Formal so badly but I was terribly nervous to ask her (even though Ms. Lassiter does an amazing job teaching confidence). The boys got to ask the girls for the first dance, but I got scared so I didn't ask her. The ladies got to ask for the second dance and she didn't ask me which was OK! The boys had to ask the girls for the third and final partner dance and it was my time to shine and ask her. I would honestly like to tell you that I asked her for that dance. But I didn't. I didn't get to dance with her at that Spring Formal and I would never get the opportunity to dance with her again because she moved to North Carolina later that year. As heartbreaking as this was, I am very thankful for it because I learned from it, and now I get to tell this to students to encourage them to ask the partners that they desire. And if they don't, then there is a good chance they will move to another state."

Pushing through reluctance

"In all seriousness, if it wasn't for the persistence of my family, I would have ended my relationship with Perfectly Polished many years ago. I would 'forget' my tie and slacks at home, and by the end of the school day, they would be waiting on me in the office along with a note from my mother. My father would pre-tie my neck ties before he would leave on business trips to ensure that I had one to wear at that week's class...it is truly a family effort... I eventually realized that it was actually pretty enjoyable. I had the opportunity to dance with girls which is never a bad thing! I was beginning to really start implementing the table skills into my everyday life, putting me on the receiving end of many compliments at the dinner tables of family friends."

Staying power of social skills

"Perfectly Polished has been one of the single most powerful areas of my life that has had the most real influence on developing me into the man that I am today. And I chose to be an instructor at Perfectly Polished so that maybe the students will see how vital the program is to one's development and future."

Perfectly Polished Spotlight: Leah!

Our etiquette school, Perfectly Polished, opened in 1985; today, we teach around 4,000 students a year in 12 area counties. We've loved watching our students grow up over the years. Sometimes, they become young adults who help us teach our younger students! Join us in spotlighting some of these young adults who make Perfectly Polished so special...

We are pleased to continue our series in spotlighting members of our Perfectly Polished student staff, especially those who have been with us since they were some of our youngest Perfectly Polished students! Today, we spotlight Leah Smith.

Leah started taking Perfectly Polished lessons in fifth grade; now, she's a freshman at UGA. She says that her experience in learning and teaching etiquette has given her "crucial skills" that have helped with job interviews and college applications.

Awkward (but fun!) dancing
"My friends and I always enjoyed learning the simple table etiquette and fun line dances. However, I also recall how the boys never wanted to hold my hands to dance. They always held them slightly below mine floating awkwardly in the air without touching. I didn’t mind though, simply because I thought their hands were sweaty and clammy! I still have the memories of getting dressed up with our little white gloves and eating skittles or gold fish out of a bowl to learn how to properly eat soup."

Changing the world with kindness
"Learning the etiquette skills I have through Perfectly Polished has enabled me to be better prepared for real life situations. Also, the world simply needs more politeness! By teaching etiquette to children, the next generation is learning how to properly treat one another with respect. I’ve learned so much through Perfectly Polished that I hope more children are able to learn as well. Simple lessons, such as how to properly introduce yourself or eat politely and correctly, have helped me so much in life!"

Perfectly Polished Spotlight: Laura Margaret

Our etiquette school, Perfectly Polished, opened in 1985; today, we teach around 4,000 students a year in 12 area counties. We've loved watching our students grow up over the years. Sometimes, they become young adults who help us teach our younger students! Join us in spotlighting some of these young adults who make Perfectly Polished so special...

We are pleased to continue our series in spotlighting members of our Perfectly Polished student staff, especially those who have been with us since they were some of our youngest Perfectly Polished students! Today, we spotlight Laura Margaret Burbach.

Here she is practicing interview skills with students of The Ron Clark Academy .

Burbach started taking Perfectly Polished lessons at age 10; now 20, she's studying public policy at Georgia Tech.

Early highlights

"I loved dancing when I was little, so it was so much fun to get to learn the dances at Perfectly Polished. Once I joined staff, I thought it was so funny that the fifth grade boys already hated holding hands with the girls—even when they were wearing gloves!"

Teaching helps the teacher

"Teaching to someone else always helps solidify what you know. Teaching also serves as a strong motivator to carry out the lessons of manners, respect, and professionalism in your own life, because you know your students are watching you and looking up to you."

Etiquette's opportunities

"Etiquette is subtle thing that is only noticed in its absence. For anything—college meetings, job interviews, class presentations—it'd be silly to miss an amazing opportunity because you had poor posture, failed to hold eye contact, or couldn't hold a simple conversation. Perfectly Polished builds confidence from a young age in these critical areas so that they become natural behavior—one less thing to worry about when these important opportunities do arise."

Charge your plates

What's a charger?

No, not the kind for your phone...but the big, fancy plate that makes your table beautiful. You know—the plate on which you don't actually place food.

Chargers, also known as service plates, sit under the dinner plate. They are typically larger than a regular plate so that an inch or two of the decorative plate is visible. Chargers help create a completed look for the entire table, and also allow for the addition of color.

If you've ever used or seen a charger, it's likely been at a formal event, or during the holidays, when many hosts use silver, gold, green, or red chargers with white plates for a festive table.

And, trust us—you really are not supposed to eat on the charger! It's truly an aesthetic touch, though it does have a practical use—it makes removing plates from the table easy, and also keeps a formal table from having an empty place setting. Next time you want to set an immediate dinner mood in a creative way, think of the charger!

Perfectly Polished Spotlight: Emily Noakes

Since our etiquette school, Perfectly Polished, opened in 1985, we have had the distinct honor of getting to know some wonderful children over the years, watching them grow up, and - in some cases - later assist us in teaching our younger students! Since we teach around 4,000 students each year in 12 area counties, we truly appreciate their gifts—and the  fact that our younger students can see a glimpse of how etiquette and social skills can shape their future.

We'll be spotlighting one of these young people regularly, starting with...Emily Noakes! 

(That's her in the middle.)

Emily started Perfectly Polished in the 5th grade; now she's 16 years old and in the 11th grade. We asked Emily to share her early memories of being in Perfectly Polished and more...

Early days
"I was just like a few of those kids in 5th grade who were not too excited to be in the program. I couldn't see the positive influence it was having on me. I came out of my shell and became a social butterfly, because I learned how to show confidence through my appearance and actions. I want to help shy kids like the old me come out of their shells, and blossom into the kids I know that they can become."

Helping younger students
"I get to see these kids grow. I get to see the impact I have on them, and see the smiles on their faces as they finally break through, and see how much fun Perfectly Polished can be, if you open yourself up to it. I love seeing those shy kids who didn't know anyone laugh with the others, and participate the most by the end of the year."

Why etiquette matters
"I think it is very important to teach etiquette to children, because it teaches the kids how to grow. It teaches them how to conquer the oncoming future with confidence. Things like holding a conversation, keeping an audience's attention, and even writing letters can be a huge benefit to handling life. Skills learned in Perfectly Polished will probably stick with me my entire life, and have opened new doors for me...I learned how to face my fears of public speaking, while showing confidence. I learned how to ace a job interview, and to nail that first impression. Without Perfectly Polished, I would be a totally different person, and I am very glad that it has shaped me into the person that I am today."