Manners are a treat

Halloween night is upon us! That means it's time to review some basic manners before little ghosts and princesses and pirates zoom around on a candy-induced sugar high.

• If trick-or-treating traffic is high, take care on the sidewalks: step to the right and let others walk by, and remind older children to avoid plowing down smaller children!

• Conquering several neighborhoods by car? Take care not to slam car doors, and of course watch out for other moving vehicles.

• Only go to houses with lights on. Any others won't have candy, anyway.

• Ring a doorbell just once.

• Say thank you before you go!

Happy Halloween!

SCARY stories of BAD manners!

Halloween makes us think of spooky stories...and what's more spooky (well, to us) than some scary stories of bad manners?

We're not just talking about a mere faux pas here and there. We're only human, after all! No - we're talking about WORST CASE SCENARIOS!

That means something different for everyone, we know, but here are a few of our top Worst Case Manners Scenarios - and how to handle them with ease!

Forgetting someone's name in a social situation. You could try re-introducing yourself, join a conversation and perk up your ears in case someone says the name, or unobtrusively ask an understanding friend. But what if you're trying to make introductions and suddenly forget the name? Horrors! Smile, look that person in the eye, and say, "Please tell me your name." No need to apologize! Keep it simple and straightforward.

Extreme tardiness. Everyone is late sometimes, but what if you're really late for something really important, like a wedding, party (especially if you're the guest of honor), high-powered meeting, or first date? For parties, always call ahead so the host can plan accordingly. Some things—like meetings or doctor's appointments—may need to be rescheduled, so call ahead for those, too. For weddings and similar events, remember it's not all about you, and arrive as quietly as possible.

 

Awkward houseguests. First of all, if you're going to visit someone, read our tips first. If you're the host and having a hard time keeping everyone entertained, offer a few choices for activities and ask for their input. Suggest a walk around the block or a drive into town to get sedentary guests off the couch. If diet is a challenge, you can again offer a few menu choices and solicit their opinion. Sometimes all you need to do is offer a choice to get the ball rolling.

Undertipping and realizing later. First, check out our tipping guide. If you undertip at a local establishment you frequent regularly, feel free to make it up next time. If you're traveling on the road and won't be going back, you can always mail a hand-written note (with compliments of their service included) to the hotel or restaurant. And try to keep the good service industry karma going by tipping well at the next place.

Miscommunication. What if you say something to a friend and later realize that your innocent, throwaway comment could have been taken completely the wrong way? What if he or she is mortally offended or wondering what on earth is wrong with you? It's a horrible feeling to have, but remember: miscommunication can be solved with communication. Call your friend and explain yourself, and be prepared to apologize. True friends will understand, and know you'll return the favor next time they misspeak!

No need to make Halloween scarier than it is. Let trick-or-treaters enjoy the chills and thrills and you can leave spooky tales of awkward etiquette far behind!

Parties with kids

Between Halloween (right around the corner!) and the regular amount of birthdays, children's party season is in full swing! We'd like to remind you that even though the guests are young, the same manners should apply. To make life easier, follow our tips!

RSVP! Parents like to know how many cupcakes to bake or party favors to make.

Ask to help. More elaborate children's parties may benefit from adult supervision during certain activities. 
 
Be on time. Unless the party specifies "drop-in" hours, try to be on time. We all know that "kid time" (especially when infants are involved) is a little different than "regular time," but make an effort whenever possible.

Don't ignore the kids. If the parents are sticking around, pay attention to the children, especially younger ones who need more direction and redirection. 

Prepare for presents. If gifts are involved and the guests are very young, remind your children that the birthday boy or girl is the one (and the only one) to open the presents. This is a good opportunity to talk about being patient and taking turns—skills kids need to learn anyway. If your child is the birthday girl or boy, remind them that if they open a present they dislike, they only need to say two words: "Thank you!"

Leave on time. Even if a magnificent time was had by all, chances are that the hosts are tired and ready to take a nap by the end. Don't linger when the party is over—say your goodbyes and thank-yous and make plans to talk about another playdate soon. (Remember: if young guests tend to fall apart, cry, pitch fits and/or throw tantrums when it's time to go, then you know it was a successful party!)

 Say thanks. Guests, thank the host for inviting you. Hosts, thank the guests for coming. And guests of honor—remember to send thank-you cards if received any presents!

Just treats, please

Do you live in October Country?

It’s a place where “the hills are fog and the rivers are mist…whose people are autumn people, thinking only autumn thoughts…whose people passing at night on the empty walks sound like rain…”

That lovely piece of writing is from Ray Bradbury’s “The October Country,” and it describes this time of year perfectly (though it’s a little more humid than foggy where we live). It’s also the time of year when little spooks ring our doorbells and ask for candy.

Halloween really is a little tricky. We spent a lot of time telling children not to accept candy from strangers, after all.

On the other hand, the holiday is a great opportunity to teach your children how to politely interact with others.

• Plan ahead. This year, Halloween falls on a Sunday, prompting some communities to switch Halloween activities to Oct. 30. Some neighborhoods also have established times for acceptable trick-or-treating. Regardless of your own thoughts on this subject, learn when your community will celebrate—it’s no fun to get dressed up, ring doorbells, and find out all the candy is gone.

• When meeting other trick-or-treaters on the sidewalk, say hello and step to the right to pass them. Avoid plowing down smaller children.

• If you’re collecting candy by car, close car doors softly and be alert when walking around moving vehicles.

• Avoid houses with no lights on—there won’t be any candy there, anyway.

• Encourage patience while waiting in line at a popular house. Ring the doorbell only once (try to restrain yourself from banging on the door, even if you are pining for sugar). When the door opens, say “Trick or Treat!” or “Happy Halloween”—but don’t shove your bag in the person’s face.

• If you’re given the bowl of candy to choose from, don’t hem and haw and pick your way through—just take a few pieces (not a handful) and be on your way. But first remember to say thank you!

• Leave behind a good impression, not candy wrappers on the lawn or trampled flowers in the garden. Similarly, admire holiday decorations, but don’t touch or play with them.

Happy Halloween!