LL Cool J is quite the family man. Not only is the rapper and actor the featured Celebrity Q & A in the February issue of Family Circle (the hardest part of being a dad? "Remaining open-minded"), but now he's singing the praises of children's etiquette.
To be more precise, he said in a recent interview that he has hired an etiquette consultant to work with his children.
"I want my kids to know how to walk in a room and to have some manners and to know how to be polite," LL Cool J told TV Guide. "You have to learn that somewhere. You don't just assume that it just happens."
As children's etiquette teachers, we meet a lot of caring parents just like LL Cool J who want the best for their children, including the tools to be successful in life. And we are more than happy to provide those tools. Knowing how to behave in different social settings not only gives children confidence, but it reinforces the importance of treating other people well, and we're all about that. Thanks, LL Cool J!
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Friday, February 11, 2011
Hearts!
Valentine’s Day is Monday. Today is Friday. If you are a parent, that means your child is likely getting preparing by either buying or making cards to bring to school. (Or, if you tend to procrastinate like many fine people, that means you are planning to get or make cards Sunday night.)
Keep in mind the following:
• You might think that Valentine's Day cards and candy go hand-in-hand, but keep in mind that some schools have policies on bringing candy or treats, whether it’s based on allergies or a preference not to bring sweets to school. Talk to your child’s teacher and find out whether you can send candy before you do so.
• Be sure that your child has enough cards for every student in the classroom so that no one is left out. If you need a head count, ask your child’s teacher. Don’t forget to include cards for your child’s teachers!
• If you are addressing each card, make sure you have the proper spellings of each student’s name. You can also leave the Valentine cards blank, and just have your child sign them.
• And of course, remind your child to say “Thank you” when receiving cards!
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
Candy hearts and first dates
Ah, Valentine’s Day: a time of red and pink hearts, candy and chocolate (no objections there) and...possibly your very first date, a nerve-wracking time for all involved.
Maybe you’re about to go on your first date. Maybe you are the parent of someone who is about to go on a first date. In either case, we are sure that you are contemplating many things right now. Are you about to meet someone’s parents for the first time? Are you the parent, about to be met? What joy, anticipation and panic is in store for you!
Don’t worry. We’re here to help!
Before the date
• Plan ahead. Don’t wait until the last minute to ask someone out on a date. Once you’ve got the OK, make dinner reservations in advance.
• Be clean. This goes for your car, your clothes, and your body.
• Have money. If you ask someone on a date, be prepared to pay for it.
• Be on time. Don’t make your date wait, and stick to the schedule for dinner reservations. If you are a young person, remember to abide by any curfews set in place—especially if you want to curry favor with the parents, which brings us to…
Meeting the parents
• Don’t worry if this feels old-fashioned. When your date or your date’s parents enter the room, stand up.
• Whether you are standing or sitting, keep good posture — don’t slouch over.
• Make eye contact and smile when you shake hands.
At dinner
• Make sure your cell phone is silenced and kept out of sight.
• If you’re dining at a formal restaurant, tell the maitre d’ your name and the time of your reservation. If the maitre d’ leads the way to the table, the lady should follow first, then her date — and don’t forget to thank the person seating you.
• Remember your basic table manners — chew with your mouth closed (and swallow before you speak), keep your elbows off the table, eat bite-sized pieces.
Door, Chair, Coat
If all else fails, think of three things: the door, the chair, the coat — as in holding car and building doors open, offering seats at the table, and helping your date in and out of her coat. You might have guessed that this advice generally pertains to the young man. This might sound old-fashioned to you. In our opinion, doing these things does not at all suggest that your date is helpless. It is not a commentary on larger male and female roles in society. However, it is a nonverbal way of telling your date that you like her and enjoy doing things that are helpful for her. It is a way to be kind.
And isn’t kindness a big part of the holiday? Happy Valentine’s Day!
Maybe you’re about to go on your first date. Maybe you are the parent of someone who is about to go on a first date. In either case, we are sure that you are contemplating many things right now. Are you about to meet someone’s parents for the first time? Are you the parent, about to be met? What joy, anticipation and panic is in store for you!
Don’t worry. We’re here to help!
Before the date
• Plan ahead. Don’t wait until the last minute to ask someone out on a date. Once you’ve got the OK, make dinner reservations in advance.
• Be clean. This goes for your car, your clothes, and your body.
• Have money. If you ask someone on a date, be prepared to pay for it.
• Be on time. Don’t make your date wait, and stick to the schedule for dinner reservations. If you are a young person, remember to abide by any curfews set in place—especially if you want to curry favor with the parents, which brings us to…
Meeting the parents
• Don’t worry if this feels old-fashioned. When your date or your date’s parents enter the room, stand up.
• Whether you are standing or sitting, keep good posture — don’t slouch over.
• Make eye contact and smile when you shake hands.
At dinner
• Make sure your cell phone is silenced and kept out of sight.
• If you’re dining at a formal restaurant, tell the maitre d’ your name and the time of your reservation. If the maitre d’ leads the way to the table, the lady should follow first, then her date — and don’t forget to thank the person seating you.
• Remember your basic table manners — chew with your mouth closed (and swallow before you speak), keep your elbows off the table, eat bite-sized pieces.
Door, Chair, Coat
If all else fails, think of three things: the door, the chair, the coat — as in holding car and building doors open, offering seats at the table, and helping your date in and out of her coat. You might have guessed that this advice generally pertains to the young man. This might sound old-fashioned to you. In our opinion, doing these things does not at all suggest that your date is helpless. It is not a commentary on larger male and female roles in society. However, it is a nonverbal way of telling your date that you like her and enjoy doing things that are helpful for her. It is a way to be kind.
And isn’t kindness a big part of the holiday? Happy Valentine’s Day!
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Training - mark your calendars now!
Have you ever considered becoming a children’s etiquette consultant? Now’s a good time to get out your calendar and make plans, because we have three training weeks on the schedule for 2011.
We’ve blogged before a little about what it’s like to train with us to become a certified children’s etiquette consultant. Not only do you learn from the experts (Dorothea Johnson, the founder of the Protocol School of Washington, calls us “the nation’s most outstanding source of children’s etiquette training”), but you have a great time meeting other future consultants, spending time with the outstanding children we teach, and leave ready to start your own business.
When you train with us, you
• Attend a five-day, hands-on training course
• Learn from our trainers and experts, who have in-depth knowledge and personal experience
• Have access to knowledge from our extended team of experts
• Receive a universally-accepted, updated curriculum for 8-24-year-old students
• Receive resource guides for business operations, marketing and PR, and social dance
• Observe and participate in student-interactive classes
• Enjoy a six course dining tutorial
• Have a professional photograph session
• Receive our continued professional support long after you’ve been certified
Our 2011 training sessions are April 11-15, June 20-24, and Nov. 7-11. Feel free to sign up online, or visit our website for more information. Hope to see you soon!
We’ve blogged before a little about what it’s like to train with us to become a certified children’s etiquette consultant. Not only do you learn from the experts (Dorothea Johnson, the founder of the Protocol School of Washington, calls us “the nation’s most outstanding source of children’s etiquette training”), but you have a great time meeting other future consultants, spending time with the outstanding children we teach, and leave ready to start your own business.
When you train with us, you
• Attend a five-day, hands-on training course
• Learn from our trainers and experts, who have in-depth knowledge and personal experience
• Have access to knowledge from our extended team of experts
• Receive a universally-accepted, updated curriculum for 8-24-year-old students
• Receive resource guides for business operations, marketing and PR, and social dance
• Observe and participate in student-interactive classes
• Enjoy a six course dining tutorial
• Have a professional photograph session
• Receive our continued professional support long after you’ve been certified
Our 2011 training sessions are April 11-15, June 20-24, and Nov. 7-11. Feel free to sign up online, or visit our website for more information. Hope to see you soon!
Thursday, January 27, 2011
Mystery!
Every January, we like to surprise our high school students with a Mystery Destination. We load them up on a bus and they have no idea where they’re going!
Our high schoolers have often been our students since they were very young. We’ve witnessed them grow into future leaders. Our Mystery Destination is a way to honor their presence in our lives, but it’s also a reward for us to spend quality time with these young men and women. Of course, there’s an educational aspect to it, too, as you’ll see.
We allow no technology - including iPods and cell phones - while on the bus. For the whole drive to a nearby camp, the students had real conversations with their friends, chatting away with seatmates and the people sitting in front and back of them.
We spent the day dancing (remember - we teach social dance, among other things), grilling hot dogs and s’mores...basically, having a wonderful time with each other. All the while, our students honed their conversational skills, something they definitely need to succeed in their futures (and they will).
One hilarious activity we did was “Cinderella Shoes.” The young men stood on one side of the room, their backs turned to the young women who each took off one shoe and placed it in the middle of the floor. Each young man had to choose a shoe, find its owner, get on one knee and ask the young woman to dance.
Are you thinking that there is no way on earth any teenager would consent to this activity? Guess what—they loved it. It’s amazing what happens when young people strip away the buzzing distractions and allow themselves to have pure, unadulterated fun. And it’s good for the adults to see it!
Our high schoolers have often been our students since they were very young. We’ve witnessed them grow into future leaders. Our Mystery Destination is a way to honor their presence in our lives, but it’s also a reward for us to spend quality time with these young men and women. Of course, there’s an educational aspect to it, too, as you’ll see.
We allow no technology - including iPods and cell phones - while on the bus. For the whole drive to a nearby camp, the students had real conversations with their friends, chatting away with seatmates and the people sitting in front and back of them.
We spent the day dancing (remember - we teach social dance, among other things), grilling hot dogs and s’mores...basically, having a wonderful time with each other. All the while, our students honed their conversational skills, something they definitely need to succeed in their futures (and they will).
One hilarious activity we did was “Cinderella Shoes.” The young men stood on one side of the room, their backs turned to the young women who each took off one shoe and placed it in the middle of the floor. Each young man had to choose a shoe, find its owner, get on one knee and ask the young woman to dance.
Are you thinking that there is no way on earth any teenager would consent to this activity? Guess what—they loved it. It’s amazing what happens when young people strip away the buzzing distractions and allow themselves to have pure, unadulterated fun. And it’s good for the adults to see it!
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Celebrate Hot Tea Month with our expert tips!
January is National Hot Tea Month, and we couldn’t be more excited. At this very moment, our town has had a record snowfall. Are you cold, too? Put the kettle on – but first read these tips from our guest blogger Bruce Richardson, tea expert and author of several books about tea, including The New Tea Companion (co-authored with Jane Pettigrew) and Tea and Etiquette (co-authored with Dorothea Johnson). Bruce kindly allows us to share these words from his blog. Thanks, Bruce!
Six Steps to Better Tea
1. Clean out your old teas
Yes, tea does have a shelf life. That tin of tea you bought at Harrods in 1995 is past its prime. Toss the tea leaves on your garden and keep the tin as a memory of your London experience, or better yet, fill it with new tea and reach for it more often. Old tea won't hurt you but it will taste flat and flavorless.
2. Invest in a kettle
I am amazed at the number of people who ask me how long they should microwave their tea water! Let's get down to basics - if you want to make good tea you have to have a proper kettle. You can invest as little as $20 for a simple electric model or $35-$75 for a solid stove top kettle. There's even an Asian kettle that sells for under $50 and doubles as a kettle or teapot. A good kettle will change your life!
3. Filter your water
I wrote a story about good water for tea in a previous blog. It boils down to this, get the chlorine and iron out of your water. In most instances, a simple counter top filtered pitcher will suffice. I use an under-the-counter two-stage filter for my water at home that cost under $100. Don't use bottled distilled water because it has no minerals and avoid most spring waters because they have too much mineral content. Bottled drinking water usually has the best balance of minerals for tea.
4. Buy a teapot or two
Your tea will taste better if you brew it in a pot rather than a cup or mug. I suggest a small porcelain or iron pot for single users and a larger 4-6 cup pot for sharing tea with friends. After all, tea is the universal beverage that brings people together. There is no better way to show hospitality than to share a pot of tea on a cold day in January!
5. Switch from teabags to loose tea
Americans have fallen in love again with great loose teas. The taste is far superior to bagged teas. Plus the proliferation of so many infuser baskets, brewing sacks, and other infusing devices has made steeping easy. Anyone can steep tea at home or in the office. It's not rocket science!
6. Water temperature matters
Every tea family has a optimum steeping temperature and time. It's easy to remember that the darker the tea leaves, the hotter the water. Here's a simple guide to the four tea families:
* Black tea: 4-5 minutes at 212° F
* Oolong tea: 2-4 minutes at 195°-205° F
* Green tea: 2-4 minutes at 175° F
* White tea: 3-5 minutes at 165° F
My benediction for you during these cold days of winter is to go forth and make good tea!
Friday, January 7, 2011
Adults, children, and wedding invitations
Today’s post comes from Robert Hickey, Deputy Director of the Protocol School of Washington, author of “Honor & Respect: The Official Guide to Names, Titles, and Forms of Address,” and one of our trainers at ELI. Here, he answers a question that likely many of you have wondered about, although he’s changed the names and address from the original query. Thank you, Robert!
Should an adult child receive his or her own wedding invitation?
Question:
I received an invitation to the wedding of a first cousin’s child addressed to us as The Wright Family. My daughter Jessica, now 20 and in college in Florida, was not listed by name, but is, I believe, invited. I think a proper invitation should have been mailed to her in Florida as she is an adult and not living at home.
I am trying to remember the rule about how all grown children over 16 should receive their own invitation at their proper address: not Mommy and Daddy’s if they don’t live there. I want to explain the rules to my cousins!
Robert says:
OK, there are a couple of parts to your question!
First, are adult children sent their own invitations?
Yes, family members living at another address are sent their own invitations.
But, to me, it’s defendable to believe Jessica in college is still “a minor in the nest,” and your address is still her best mailing address. So either sending Jessica her own invitation to your address, or listing Jessica by name on your invitation, is better than sending an invitation to her Florida address.
Whether the cut is 16 years of age: sending an invitation to a young adult of any age is always considerate and appreciated.
And, whether she is “Miss Wright” or “Ms. Wright”: Either is correct. “Miss” is more traditional (maybe old-fashioned?) since every young woman older than 12 might choose to be a “Ms.” nowadays.
Now, part two: How to address the envelope!
Everyone who is invited should be listed on the envelope for clarity. For your family—if Jessica’s invitation is sent to your home—a very formal example would be:
Mr. and Mrs. William Wright
Miss Jessica Wright
445 St. Elmo Avenue
Severna Park, MD 21146
If there is an inside envelope, the invited guests are listed again:
Mr. and Mrs. Wright
Miss Wright
On the inside envelope the tradition is to use the “conversational” form of their name. The above form is a formal “conversational” example. Certainly, your cousins could write “Uncle Bill, Aunt Val, and Jessica” on the inside envelope if they wanted to be less formal.
Should an adult child receive his or her own wedding invitation?
Question:
I received an invitation to the wedding of a first cousin’s child addressed to us as The Wright Family. My daughter Jessica, now 20 and in college in Florida, was not listed by name, but is, I believe, invited. I think a proper invitation should have been mailed to her in Florida as she is an adult and not living at home.
I am trying to remember the rule about how all grown children over 16 should receive their own invitation at their proper address: not Mommy and Daddy’s if they don’t live there. I want to explain the rules to my cousins!
Robert says:
OK, there are a couple of parts to your question!
First, are adult children sent their own invitations?
Yes, family members living at another address are sent their own invitations.
But, to me, it’s defendable to believe Jessica in college is still “a minor in the nest,” and your address is still her best mailing address. So either sending Jessica her own invitation to your address, or listing Jessica by name on your invitation, is better than sending an invitation to her Florida address.
Whether the cut is 16 years of age: sending an invitation to a young adult of any age is always considerate and appreciated.
And, whether she is “Miss Wright” or “Ms. Wright”: Either is correct. “Miss” is more traditional (maybe old-fashioned?) since every young woman older than 12 might choose to be a “Ms.” nowadays.
Now, part two: How to address the envelope!
Everyone who is invited should be listed on the envelope for clarity. For your family—if Jessica’s invitation is sent to your home—a very formal example would be:
Mr. and Mrs. William Wright
Miss Jessica Wright
445 St. Elmo Avenue
Severna Park, MD 21146
If there is an inside envelope, the invited guests are listed again:
Mr. and Mrs. Wright
Miss Wright
On the inside envelope the tradition is to use the “conversational” form of their name. The above form is a formal “conversational” example. Certainly, your cousins could write “Uncle Bill, Aunt Val, and Jessica” on the inside envelope if they wanted to be less formal.
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